Linger with me for a week
Daily meditations from the place that inspires me the most
Day 1 - 6/22
I drove to camp today knowing it’s been 20 years since my parents first brought me here. Changed my life in immeasurable ways.
Matt had told me I would stay in a cabin called Deer Valley. The building has 3 sections, two on the upper level and one on the bottom. It wasn’t until I walked into the section I knew was mine for the week that I realized I was staying in the same cabin I stayed in that first week at camp in 2004. The bed I slept on looks exactly the same. The purple tie blanket spread across my bunk in the first photo taken of me at camp is at my parents’ house right now. I can’t believe I didn’t bring it.
Day 2 - 6/23
I feel so much more at ease as a leader this year. I am less tightly wound. Letting go of the need to manage everything. I hope I’m giving these girls a better experience because of it.
Day 3 - 6/24
Even when camp feels different, it magically feels like it always has. It’s stunning to watch new and old camp generations mix. There are two different worlds of camp we’ve experienced. Yet what remains the same is the way these campers feel so safe and loved.
Day 4 - 6/25
Matthew turns into such a fuller, elevated version of himself at camp. He is so confident and sure. That is a man living out what he is meant to do. He is the embodiment of the beauty of camp. I am so proud and excited to watch him continue to do this for years to come. Camp is the lifeblood of our family.
Day 5 - 6/26
The exhaustion is hitting me a lot harder than normal and a lot earlier, but the joy is uncontainable.
Day 6 - 6/27
My camper who desperately wanted to go home is slowly falling in love with camp. Her entire heart has opened up. She’s lighter. I told her she was going to love it and she didn’t believe me. I knew the power.
Several campers have told me I’ve made an impact in their lives. I’m living out my dreams of giving children the camp experience I had. This is all I’ve ever wanted.
Day 7 - 6/28
This week has changed my understanding of myself as a counselor and a leader. I am capable even if I don’t control every tiny thing. I can be flexible and things will not fall apart. I feel like I have been a better version of myself this week and these girls have felt it. I stopped trying to create an experience where every step is right in line and instead created an experience that shows them how beautiful a life connected with camp can be, how this place can change how they live with this disease for the better. I am more fulfilled than I have ever been. I can’t believe that even after 20 years, this place continues to change me in immeasurable ways.
Day 8 - 6/29. Home.
My sadness around leaving camp has shifted as an adult. Camp is much more engrained in my life with Matt as the Programs Manager. I never fully disengage from camp like I had to as a camper. I’m more so nostalgic for this contained week of my life that I can never return to. Those exact group of girls in that exact moment in time, those exact rushes of laughter and overwhelming joy. I wish I could live in it forever. But what a blessing to know there will always be more.
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